Are You Caught in Write + Delete Syndrome?
In my work with all kinds of writers, one of the practices I encourage is writing without deleting or editing along the way. Why? Because we miss out on all kinds of good stuff when we're trying to "get it right" on the first pass.
As I told one client this week, editing is its own process – and you get to do it AFTER you write. Editing as you go may save you time later, but it can also keep the writing so tightly hemmed in that it never has a chance to breathe fully on the page.
This approach might bring up feelings of fear – what if I'm just wasting my time here? What if this isn't going anywhere? What if, what if? That's ok! These fears are likely protective. Their only job is to keep you from going off the rails.
Instead of letting them run the show, what if you offer them some gentle reassurance? For example, you could write, "Editing comes later" on a sticky note where you can see it while you're writing. The part of your that's afraid you will just end up with a big mess will get the message that you are actually being intentional.
Perfectionism also tends to crop up most vehemently when we're simply tired. Sometimes, when I see myself getting into this deleting business, I realize what I really need to hear is: It's ok to stop. You don't have to push through anything. Step away from the page, from the screen, and come back when you're refreshed.
Naturally, all of this also makes me think about Shabbat. After all, what is Shabbat if not an intentional, reliable experience of refreshing our minds and spirits? When we light candles on Friday evenings and welcome Shabbat with a blessing, we step into a "palace in time," as Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel described Jewish sacred time. I also love these words from poet and philosopher Asher Ginsberg (1856-1927): "More than Jews have kept Shabbat, Shabbat has kept the Jews."
It's very easy to be "on" all the time. Working, being of service, taking care of the life things that can sometimes take huge swaths of time because of systems and red tape and waiting, making and keeping appointments, listening and responding – we avail ourselves to the world out of both choice and necessity. There is great purpose here, and also sometimes headaches and frustration. There are moments of meaningful connection and times of too-much-ness.
Rather than going, going, going and waiting until we're waaaay past the moment when we needed to hit the pause button, what if you incorporated consistent breaks into your days and weeks?
On Shabbat, my focus shifts. I move at my own pace. I don’t look at my Google calendar. I might meet up with my sister for a walk or have a phone date with a friend. I might go to services or just stay home in sweats all day. I might bake something or read a book or just putter around. It’s a day when being takes the foreground. And this means that when I re-enter the stream of doing, I can be considerably more present.
Well, let’s be real: there is intention and then there is experience. I miss the mark sometimes; I get distracted and sidetracked, or a story or situation will hijack my attention and it will take some conscious effort to coax myself back. None of this is terrible, it’s just real life. We are always practicing – and it’s the practice that matters most.
One thing I know for sure: keeping Jewish time, designating these 24 or so hours as sacred, undoubtedly has a positive impact on how I show up the other six days of the week.
Next time you find yourself writing and deleting, or painstakingly editing every sentence before it even has a chance to say hello, play with giving yourself permission to pause. Maybe the perfectionism cropping up is really a messenger telling you that you need a break.
Step out of busy and back into balance – for a day, an hour, or even a minute. A little can go a long way. Then come back and see what changes. I'd love to hear what you discover.